Do you ever feel so tired you have to force yourself to stay awake? Do small problems sometimes elicit big emotional reactions? Do you get things done through sheer willpower even though you’re exhausted? You may not be getting adequate rest. Getting adequate rest—and making it a priority—is one of the easiest things you can do to begin moving towards optimal weight and wellness. Getting adequate sleep will: Increase your ability to choose your response rather than just react. Give you the physical energy you need to get things done. Help your body release excess weight. Make achieving your physical goals easier. Help you see life situations and solutions more clearly. Make getting adequate rest a priority—and work your life around that. Easier said than done, right? Kids, work, books, television, chores, pets, spouses can all seem to conspire against your getting a good night’s sleep. Here are some ways to help you achieve your goal of getting adequate rest. Decide that it is a priority. This may sound simplistic, but the reason it feels so hard to achieve is that you have not made a hard and fast decision that this is something you will achieve to the best of your ability. Share your goal and Why you want to achieve it with your family. They may resist at first, but when they experience the rested you versus the cranky, too tired you, they will appreciate the new and improved version. Create a plan. Once you set a time you want to be in bed and get up, put it in your day-planner and work backwards. Anticipate the obstacles are you going to face and figure out beforehand how you are going to […]
Being Perfect Is Getting In Your Way of Releasing the Weight
Definition of PERFECT 1 per•fect adjective \ˈpər-fikt\ a : being entirely without fault or defect : FLAWLESS <a perfect diamond> b : satisfying all requirements : ACCURATE c : corresponding to an ideal standard or abstract concept <a perfect gentleman> d : faithfully reproducing the original; specifically : LETTER-PERFECT –Merriam Webster Many of the women I work with feel like they have to diet and exercise perfectly or they have “blown it.” This is often when they give up on their dream to create the body they want. The good news is there is more to the definition of perfect than “corresponding to an ideal standard.” Because eating an unplanned cookie or missing a scheduled workout does not mean that you are defective in any way. The truth is, you can satisfy all requirements for releasing the weight without having to walk that tightrope of doing it perfectly. In fact, an occasional splurge can actually help your body break out of a weight-loss plateau, and a rare unplanned rest day may be what your body absolutely needs to keep you functioning at your best. Consistency is key to releasing the weight and keeping it off—not perfection. How would it feel to accept that you aren’t perfect, by that definition? And that you don’t have to be! What if, instead of faithfully reproducing the original you actually strive for the imperfection of creating the original? You are original. You are absolutely unique and are perfect in your uniqueness. You are the master creator of you. That means you get to create the body you want your way. You can choose the healthy eating plan that works for your body. (If you listen your body will let […]
Change How You See Yourself to Change Your Body
What if you are already perfect? Bruce D. Schneider defines perfection as “unique until itself and unlike any other.” You are uniquely perfect in your own way. No one else has had the exact same experiences as you. No one else sees the world exactly as you do. No one else has your same desires and cares. You are important to the whole. Your uniqueness is important to the Universe. Your value is intrinsic. Most women are trying to be something other than who they are because you have forgotten that you are already perfect at your core. When you know and thrill in your perfection, you are at the height of Who you really are. This is because that is how All-That-Is (The Universe, God, Source Energy, Higher Self—whatever works for you) sees every single one of us. Each person is unique, beautiful, and perfect just as they are. To Source, you are amazing, just the way you are. This may be hard to wrap your mind around. Somehow along the way, you were convinced that the perfect you that came into this world is somehow flawed. Maybe even bad. You were, in fact, convinced by people who had themselves been convinced of their own imperfection. You may spend a lot of your time beating yourself up or using a verbal lash to try to get yourself to work harder, or be smarter, or somehow . . . better. But this mindset is not serving you. In fact, it’s one of the primary ways you are sabotaging your ability to release the weight—and keep it off. What would be different about your body—and life—if you did let yourself believe in your worthiness, just […]
Isn’t Life Delicious?
(This is my love week! My husband and I are spending today celebrating our 21st Anniversary, so I’m sharing one of my favorite blogs from the archives. I’m also sending you all much love and appreciation!) DELICIOUS adj \di-ˈli-shəs\ 1: affording great pleasure : delightful 2: appealing to one of the bodily senses especially of taste or smell –Merriam-Webster Why do you eat? For very few people is it just to give their bodies the vital nutrients they need to sustain life. If you are like most women who struggle with their weight, eating is your primary source of pleasure, comfort, satisfaction, and even experience of love. This is why diets cause such feelings of deprivation. Who wants to live a life void of pleasurable feelings? Certainly not me! And you don’t have to! All that’s happened is that over time—and for a variety of valid reasons—you have shut yourself off from sources of satisfaction, comfort, and love because they have also been sources of pain, dissatisfaction, and loneliness. The lover who broke your heart, the friend who betrayed you, the parent or boss who tried to control you sent you to the one obvious and consistent source of comfort—food. It was a totally normal reaction. Food is delicious. It’s pleasurable, satisfying, and comforting. And it’s easy. But it’s also betrayed you. It’s caused you to gain weight. It’s negatively impacted your health. It’s momentary comfort is completely outweighed by the overwhelming feelings of guilt and self-loathing that it now causes. It’s no longer giving you what you were seeking in the first place—those pleasurable feelings. It’s time to begin looking for these feelings in the only place they will be given consistently. […]
Give Your Body Some Love!
(This is my love week! Not only was yesterday Valentine’s Day, but today is my 21st Anniversary to my awesome husband, David! I’ll be celebrating love through Monday. And I just want to say to David, I am so appreciative of your love and support, which has been exceptional. You are my favorite person on the planet and I am thrilled to be sharing my life with you! I love you so much! Happy Anniversary!) How does it feel when someone withholds their love from you? Pretty awful, right? If you are like most women, you are withholding love—from yourself. You are demeaning and hateful in what you say and think about your body. You are neglectful—and maybe even downright harmful—in your actions. And in many cases, you are demanding that your body prove its love for you by defying the laws of nature. You want to be slimmer right now. After years of neglect, you want optimal wellness this instant. When it cannot meet your unreasonable demands, you feel betrayed, let down, and frustrated. How long would you stay healthy in a relationship where your partner treated you that way? When you look at your body, how much does it physically reflect how you treat it, and what you say and think about it? An important step in creating the body you want is recognizing that what you have going with your body is a relationship in every sense of the word. In fact, your relationship with your body is the longest—and most important—of your life. Once you break up with your body, there is no getting back together! How is your relationship with your body? Do you ignore it? Are you constantly […]
A Radical Valentine’s Request That Will Help You Get the Body You Want
Happy Valentine’s Day! A day dedicated to love fills me with love. And I strive to make every day Valentine’s Day. Whether this day fills you with resentment for the love you don’t have in your life, feels like a day invented to sell cards and flowers, or genuinely helps you connect with that special person in your life, I have a radical request. How about asking “You” to be your Valentine this year? While this may sound like I’m asking you to be selfish, the truth is you can’t truly love another until you love yourself. Even the Bible advises this. ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ This does not say that you will love your neighbor MORE than yourself. It says love yourself and then love your neighbor AS you love yourself. Somehow, this point has gotten very misconstrued. Many women believe that it is wrong that they love themselves, or that they are not worthy of being loved. That they must give every iota of love that they have to others to be of value. But you MUST love yourself and find your intrinsic value before you can completely and fully love another. When you give from your internal well without also filling it, soon you have nothing left to give. You then grow resentful. You want others to fill your well of love. You expect others to change in order to show their love for you, or you believe they are being selfish. But who is really being selfish? Isn’t asking another to change to please you—to make you to feel loved—the more selfish act? Particularly when you understand that no one can give you what you do not give […]
How Taking Responsibility Empowers You To Get the Body You Want
I am getting a great reminder that I create my life and have responsibility for meeting my goals and intention to be self-loving—and loving to others. Sometimes that means exercising tough love—to yourself or someone else. It’s a lot easier to blame others when things aren’t going right. Common excuses I hear about losing weight are, “If my boss didn’t make my job so stressful, I wouldn’t eat so much.” “The rest of my family wants to eat junk food, so I have to eat it, too.” “My spouse won’t do the program with me, so I’m stuck doing what I’ve always done.” While these things may very well be true, shifting the blame to anyone or anything else makes you the victim—of others, situations, even the world. When you are in victim energy, you have no power to create the body—or life—that you really want. It makes you blind to the path forward—even if it’s right in front of you—and zaps your energy for taking any step towards where you want to go. Being the victim is enticing because it lets you off the hook. You don’t have to do better, try harder, or make any changes because everyone else needs to change first. But you will never create the body you want if you are waiting for anyone—or anything—else to change. To get different results, you have to take responsibility for how you show up, respond, and the actions that you take. Taking full responsibility for everything in your life means you have the power to change it. This is empowerment. Empowerment doesn’t mean easy. Sometimes the most loving thing you can do for yourself and for someone else is to create firm boundaries, […]
How to Use Respect to Get the Body You Want
A former boss of mine had a sign on his door that read, “The floggings will continue until morale improves.” It was a joke, of course. But how often do we try to motivate ourselves with the whip of internal insults, slurs, and condemnations? Does telling yourself that you’re “ugly, fat, stupid, and lazy,” really make you want to get up and do your workout, or forgo the potato chips? This may be tough to hear, but if spoken aloud, your internal dialogue might be deemed verbal abuse. Sometimes this abuse can go on practically nonstop, every day. What do you think this does to your self-esteem and belief that you can achieve your wellness goals? Pushing through this line of thinking to create action takes incredible energy and strength, much like rolling a boulder up a hill. And while progress can be made, without changing your underlying thoughts, emotions, and beliefs, one moment of mental fatigue or flagging self-discipline may result in your watching that boulder roll right back down. The result is you not only regain all the weight you lost, but then some. Changing your thoughts, emotions, and beliefs about yourself, what you want, and your ability to achieve it helps break this cycle of self-punishment. It creates a boost of momentum that makes your push towards wellness a lot more fun and sustainable. A general rule of thumb is, “If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, it’s not appropriate to say to yourself.” Begin treating yourself with the respect you deserve. Focus on all the reasons you do want to move your body and eat healthy foods. Focus on all the things you are doing to move yourself forward. […]
Create the Body You Want From the Inside Out
I had a client yesterday who said she believed she was a terrible and horrible person. Youch. That is such a painful place to be. So I playfully asked if she had stolen any babies lately? Committed any murders? Robbed any banks? Of course not. Her worst “crimes” were that in the she’d hurt people’s feelings, had yelled at people, was bitchy sometimes, and wasn’t always productive. This is normal! No one is the person they want to be 100 percent of the time. I certainly haven’t been, and am sure I will fall short in the future. This doesn’t make you—or me—a “bad” person. One of my client’s biggest limiting beliefs is believing that they are less than—less valuable, less important, less smart, less beautiful, less worthy, etc., etc.—than everyone else. The Truth is, you have intrinsic value—no matter what you do or don’t do. To begin to see this, start with how you speak to yourself. What do you say to yourself when you look in the mirror? What are your thoughts about yourself? How much praise is there compared to criticism? Would you speak to someone else the way you speak to yourself? How would they feel if you did? What if you said those things to a child? Would it nourish them, or make them cry? Often, what you say to yourself would get you arrested if you said it to a child. If it’s not OK to say to someone else, why is it OK to say to yourself? You are as unique as a snow flake. There is not anyone else in the world that has had the exact same experiences as you, or who sees the world in exactly […]
You Only Need One Thing to Make 2013 Your Year!
Happy New Year! You may be spending this day reflecting on 2012, and setting intentions and making resolutions for 2013. Would you consider adding something to your list? How about putting “Love Yourself” at the very top? This is the primary intention I’m setting for myself in 2013. I thought I had “loving myself” down. But as I’ve challenged myself to step up in a big way to better serve you, some of those old, negative voices have resurfaced. My business is expanding rapidly, and I’m learning how to up-level my energy to meet the new flow of clients and income. And this has been a huge gift. Because it is a vivid reminder of the pain I used to feel on a daily basis as I struggled with my weight. Feeling this old self-doubt and self-criticism has absolutely reinforced my focus and commitment to not only step up my own self-love—but to help you Love Your Way Slim. No woman deserves to feel this self-inflicted pain. Fortunately I have the tools, resources, and support to transform my inner critic so that it becomes a powerfully supportive—and loving—ally. There are a lot of misconceptions about self-love. Self-love is not about conceit or thinking you are “higher and mightier” than anyone else. In fact, when you are coming from a true place of self-love, it spills over onto everyone—and everything—else. And a huge bonus! Loving yourself generates positive physical processes that are not only good for your health, but make it easier to release weight. Loving yourself actually inspires loving action—towards yourself and others. When you recognize and acknowledge your own intrinsic value, you automatically see it in others. When you feel an abundance of love there is no need to […]
Stay Connected!