Someone asked me this week what I thought the key was to losing weight. My answer was, “Self-love.” Sure, through sheer willpower you can go on a diet and do an exercise program, and you will lose weight. But chances are if you don’t change the underlying thoughts, feelings, and beliefs you have about yourself, what you deserve, and your true value, as soon as you meet your goal, the weight will start packing back on. Self-love impacts us at many, many levels. Not only does it generate positive anabolic energy that rebuilds your body starting at the cellular level, but it actually inspires loving action—towards yourself and others. This includes naturally picking foods that resonate with your body, wanting to move, and consciously choosing to be happy. And when you take into consideration the Foundation Principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy,” also known as the Law of Attraction, these positive thoughts, feelings, and actions actually build on themselves and generate momentum that helps you get the body that you want. There are a lot of misconceptions about self-love. Self-love is not about conceit or thinking you are “higher and mightier” than anyone else. In fact, when you are coming from a true place of self-love, it spills over onto everyone—and everything—else. When you recognize and acknowledge your own intrinsic value, you automatically see it in others. When you feel an abundance of love there is no need to put conditions on, or limit the love that you give in any way. While loving yourself sounds easy, if you have been practicing self-loathing for a while, it takes practice to shift your thoughts, feelings, and beliefs to self-acceptance, self-appreciation, and ultimately self-love. Don’t believe me? Go […]
Satisfy the Craving Without the Food
How do you think that the experience of eating a piece of cake will make you feel? Yes, I know it will feel good, but be specific. Satisfied? Content? Comforted? Connected with others who are eating it? Loved? Overeating is often an attempt to find the love you crave and fill the void your are feeling in your heart and soul with food. It is looking in the wrong place to feel satisfied, content, comforted, connected, and loved. What if you could easily get the feelings you really want from eating that piece of cake without ever having to lift a bite to your mouth? What if the feelings were more delicious than any piece of cake could possibly be? And what if those feelings inspired action that made your wellness goals faster, easier, and more fun to achieve? Would you be willing to give it a try? Would you be willing to spend just a few minutes a day to get it? Would you be willing to look for and notice the changes you are experiencing so you can keep building on your success? Would you be willing to let it be that simple? If so, keep reading! Now imagine yourself having achieved your wellness goal. How does that feel? (Remember, be specific and feel it right now!) It might be something like: “Being 10 pounds lighter makes me feel confident. It makes me feel attractive. It makes me feel strong and beautiful. It feels invigorating and it makes me want to give my workout my all. It feels satisfying to slip on my jeans and have them be comfortable, and to know that I look good. It feels like being energized and alive. […]
Don’t You Love Your Body?
Do you suffer from body shame? Many women look in the mirror and see nothing but their flaws. They aren’t comfortable in their bodies, even with their partners in the privacy of their own bedrooms. They judge how they look way more harshly than anyone else. How likely is your body going to maintain its youth, vigor, wellness, and well-being if you abuse it with your thoughts and words? How well does a child flourish in such an environment? How healthy are your relationships when you do nothing but subject the other to constant criticism? Starving your body of nutrient rich-foods and undertaking minimal movement are just the symptoms of the mental and emotional treatment you are heaping on your body. How well are you going to treat something that you hate, loath, despise, or are ashamed of? As many teachers will tell you, the answer is to love your body. When you love your body, you want to take care of it. You appreciate it. And the positive, anabolic energy you provide it allows your body to rebuild, regenerate, and remain vital and alive. When you have experienced long-term body shame, however, trying to go immediately to loving your body feels like a big fat lie. It’s almost laughable. It feels so foreign; it’s just not a habit you can develop easily. Begin small. Start by finding one thing about your body you can appreciate. Maybe it’s your tongue. You taste foods well. You are articulate and able to communicate with it. Your tongue never lets you down. After a few days of appreciating your tongue—even for just 1 minute a day—then find something else about your body to appreciate. Perhaps your hard-working hands. […]
Whoa! Did I Create That?
I’ve taken my bed-time ritual of practicing appreciation even further–and it feels wonderful! It was my normal practice to think about all the things about my day—and life—that I appreciated as I was drifting off to sleep. But recently, I’ve shifted to thinking about the coming day and envisioning how I wanted each thing I had planned to go, and how that would feel. Here’s a sample: I think about how when I wake up rested and refreshed I feel eager to begin my day. And the appreciation I have for the small black cat who is snuggled up against me when I wake, and the appreciation for the comfort of the bed, and the satisfaction of having David beside me. I think about how getting up on time makes the morning feel easy, and gives me time to feel efficient and connected as I take care of the dogs and check my email. I think about how strong and flexible my body feels as I work out and how energized I feel afterwards. I think about how writing an inspired blog makes me feel vital and alive. And I just go through the plan I have for the day feeling how I want it to feel. It doesn’t take long, and focusing on how I want to feel as I envision feels amazing! It’s delicious, it’s magical, it’s divine! When I wake up, I then look for and tap into the eager feeling I anticipated, and so on throughout my day. What’s been fun is then watching what feels like gifts from the Universe show up. Workshop opportunities have fallen in my lap. Clients have appeared. Even David calling last night offering to bring […]
Is Action Always the Answer?
Action is a tricky thing. There’s a lot of advice out there saying you have to jump into action to spur the forces of the Universe to work on your behalf. And that’s kinda sorta true. It is true that you will never get fit sitting on your sofa. But, why are some people joyfully working out and some feel unmotivated to get off the sofa? Because the momentum for action begins way before the moment comes to get off the sofa and just do it. There is a build up of energy from thoughts, emotions, and beliefs behind the action or inaction. And willpower alone is often not enough to break out of the energetic pattern you have created. For instance, if you have spent a heck of a lot of time thinking about how much you hate exercise, you hate sweating, you hate your body, you hate how your body feels when it moves, etc., etc., getting up off the sofa will take Herculean effort. Not doing the internal work to shift this existing energetic momentum is why so many diet and exercise programs fail. When you think about the underlying principle that “Energy Attracts Like Energy” (also known at the Law of Attraction), being overly focused on where you are—or where you have been—just keeps summoning similar experiences, situations, and people so that your results never seem to change. In other words, you just don’t have the mental and physical energy to get off the sofa or maintain your action if you are able to get started–even if you desperately want to. This can lead to frustration, disillusionment, and even giving up on achieving your goals. How do you begin to slow […]
How’s That Working Out for You?
“The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.” Albert Einstein What if the entire Universe is conspiring on your behalf? What if you have tribes of Universal cheerleaders supporting you in every conceivable way? What if no matter what may be happening in your life right now, everything is playing in your favor? If you fully accepted that this is a friendly Universe, would you give up a little control? If you knew everything was working out for you, would you relax and let go of fear? Would you allow yourself to have more fun? Would you be open to taking more risks? If you believe that this is a hostile Universe, letting go of control can be one of the scariest things you can do. It’s like putting yourself at the mercy of the enemy. I know because I used to believe the Universe was out to get me. I couldn’t get a break. I was waiting for the other shoe to drop. I was a victim to people and situations. It wasn’t until I began giving up control, surrendering, and trusting my well-being that I began to fully experience it. It’s one of those dichotomy’s of life: You have to give up control to gain it. You have to feel appreciated to be able to receive the appreciation of another. You have to feel beautiful before you can hear and believe the compliments you are given. Whatever you believe—the Universe will provide you evidence of that belief. Open your mind and look for all the reasons everything is working out for you instead of all the reasons it isn’t. Make lists of the […]
Take A Step Towards Relief
How do you feel most of the time? Are you joyful, appreciative, content, and hopeful? Or are you frustrated, angry, overwhelmed, and maybe even depressed? Is there connection between how you feel most of the time and how you see the world? If you don’t think so, I’d ask you to think again! Every feeling you have is either a derivative of love or fear. Like opposite ends of a magnet, the feelings that you have are moving you closer to one pole or the other. Where you spend most of your time is reflected in how you experience life. While many people think their feelings are out of their control, this isn’t actually the case. What you are feeling is tied directly to what you are thinking. You may believe that what you are thinking about a situation is etched in stone. The situation is the situation after all. It’s either good or bad, right? How could you possibly think something different about it? You begin to take control of your thoughts and emotions when you recognize that what you think and feel is a choice. This doesn’t mean that you won’t face a situation that feels so bad that changing your thoughts simply is not an option in the moment. I would say it is pretty impossible to look at a child or animal that is suffering and change your thoughts in the moment to be all holly jolly. And I don’t think you’re meant to do that. But the solution will not be found in continuing to focus on the problem. People tend to just lock on to how horrible the problem is, and like passing a wreck on the highway, they […]
Three Tips for Living Lean
When a woman makes the decision to lose weight, often she wants the change effective immediately. It’s the mindset of, “I want to be a size 4 and I want it today.” This impatience is really being focused on the fact that you don’t have what you want, which means you are fighting the forces of the Universe and will struggle to lose weight. What does it really matter if it takes a little time to achieve your goal? It’s the pain factor, right? It’s looking in the mirror everyday and suffering from body shame. It’s feeling deprived as you turn down that piece of chocolate cake while everybody else digs in. It’s dreading the dressing room and trying on 50 swimsuits to find one that you might be willing to wear in public. It’s the risk of having your partner see you as unsex-worthy because of your sagging stomach. You want to just wave a magic wand and make it all go away. These thoughts are all symptoms of what has caused you to gain weight in the first place. At their heart is the fear of judgment and a lack of self-love. This is why so many diets and exercise programs fail. For lasting results, you have to change your core thoughts and beliefs along with eating healthy foods and moving your body. Here are three tips to let go of the thoughts that keep you from living lean. Focus on a body part you can appreciate. How often do you look in the mirror and criticize your stomach, butt, or thighs? When you catch yourself doing this, shift your attention to something you can compliment. Maybe it’s your hair, your ankles, or […]
Want A Money-Back Guarantee on Life?
While attending a workshop in Sedona, Arizona, over the next few days, I am sharing a few of my favorite blogs that you may have missed. What if wellness and well-being had a money-back guarantee? What if it was absolutely and completely yours if you would be present and willing to accept receipt? That you could check in any time you wanted and determine where your wellness and well-being was along its journey of coming to you? That it wasn’t a matter of if, only a matter of when you would have it? Would that give you more confidence and help you relax about its coming? Would it inspire you to take the few small actions that will help you prepare for it? Would you more easily be able to stay focused on the life you are creating, and feel more excited or eager about its coming? What if accepting that guarantee as true is the only thing keeping optimal wellness and well-being from you? So consider this your shipping notice from the All-That-Is Transphysical Universal Delivery System (ATITUDS). The life of your dreams is on its way to you—guaranteed. The first step in scheduling your delivery is just relaxing and enjoying the knowledge that it’s coming. To prepare for delivery, you’ll want to clear the way, which might look like reaching for healthier foods, moving your body, or taking whatever action you feel is necessary on your part to become Who you want to be. You’ll want to disregard any notices of delay as spam—these may be internal fears or limiting beliefs, or the disbelief of others. Instead, you’ll receive non-stop guidance of where your delivery is through your emotions. Positive, anabolic emotions are […]
I’m Healthy and I Know It!
Last night after brushing our very furry Keeshond dogs, I picked up the grooming table to put it away and dropped it on the ball-joint of my foot. To say it hurt is an understatement. It hurt so much, in fact, that I thought I had broken it. After hearing the crash and racing up the stairs, my fabulous husband found me writhing on the floor with my foot already turning dark shades. Remembering the RICE rule (Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation), David immediately got me up on the sofa to ice and elevate my foot. Once the initial wave of pain eased, I hobbled into the bedroom where I remained for the rest of the night. For about the first 20 minutes, I lay there trying to think about how I could alter my exercise routine to work around my injury. As I pushed myself up to a sitting position to take some Advil, I realized I’d also hurt my hand. As if reading my mind, David said, “I think it’s safe to say this is going to impact your workout routine.” In the past, this is where I would have started freaking out. Visions of backsliding and weight gain would have filled my mind. I would have been totally focused on the worst-case scenario. Ahh, I love how much I have changed. Instead, I made peace with it, started looking for the opportunities, and invited in wellness. My thoughts went something like this: This is temporary. I will heal and recover and I will be working out to full capacity again in no time. And there will be a lot of opportunities to get creative with how I move my body. Just because I’m […]
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