Yesterday’s events in Connecticut may have left you reeling emotionally. While it may feel selfish, now more than ever you need to focus on your own self-care. This includes gently moving your body, getting enough rest, reaching for some highly nutritious foods, and taking some quiet time for meditation, prayer, or reflection. And the number one thing you can do for your own wellness? Ask for the support you need. You may want to go it alone. You may not feel comfortable asking for help. You may be embarrassed by your emotions. Much of holiday stress is feeling like you are in this alone. And that’s a really tough, and painful road. This is not the time to tough it out by yourself. Study after study shows that having at least one person support you in meeting your wellness goals will dramatically increase your chances of success. Having support helps you: Normalize what you’re going through—You realize that everyone gets emotionally stressed, overwhelmed, overeats, and has moments of weakness. You are not a failure or a freak. Notice and honor what you are doing for your self-care—Having someone to share the positive steps you are taking helps keep you motivated to take more steps. Problem solve— You’ve got someone on your side who can see your situation more objectively and can help you brainstorm ways around any obstacles. Re-find your inner peace—going it alone makes it easier to get caught in the negative thought spiral going on in your head. Having support helps break the inner patterns enabling you to refocus on the present and the blessings you have in your life. Where can you find help? Ask a friend or family member—Choose someone who is […]
Be Happy Now To Get the Body You Want
Do you need a “reason” to be happy? Maybe you tell yourself you’ll be happy “when” you lose weight? Or maybe it’s “when” you recover from an illness, meet that deadline, or have a certain amount of money? I’m going to be completely honest and open with you—I’m guilty of this, too. For the first time in two years, I’ve found myself putting off “being” happy. As a result, I’ve been stressed. And I didn’t listen to my body when it was telling me to slow down. Now, I’m recovering from a lingering cold. This is an awesome reminder for me that your wellness is never “done.” You can’t mark self-care off your “to-do” list, and proclaim yourself “complete.” It’s an ever-evolving process. New things can come along that you have to adjust to and that require you to re-find your balance. You have to refocus on being happy now. What’s given me this “future focus” and caused me to put off being happy? I’m taking my business to the next level by launching my new brand and website today (!), getting ready to launch a new coaching program in January, and am planning my first ever Love Your Way Slim Beach-side Retreat in April. I’m also giving a free tele-class tonight for Impact ADHD. My topic tonight? “How to Love Your Way Through Holiday Stress.” Believe me, the irony of that topic was not lost on me while I was putting together this presentation! It may not be the holidays that are stressing me out, but stress is stress. When I got up this morning, this comment was waiting for me about a blog post I wrote this summer, The Best Reason to Be Happy. “I’m happy I found this […]
Super Woman is in the Way of Getting the Body You Want
This summer, one of my clients was giving herself a hard time because a week after moving to a new state and a few days after starting a new job, she wasn’t relaxed. In fact, she was downright stressed. I call this the Super Woman Syndrome. This is the expectation that you can—and have to!—do everything while always being happy and relaxed. How reasonable is that? Particularly if you are going through some pretty significant life changes? Super Woman Syndrome seems to turn into an epidemic during the holidays. All the shopping, decorating, socializing, cooking, sending out holiday cards—the list goes on and on. Or you may be trying to make everything perfect—for yourself or for others. It can leave you wiped out, particularly if you feel like you have to do it all yourself. Super Woman Syndrome impacts your overall wellness—and how easily you are able to get the body you want. During the holidays, exercise and sleep—those good solutions for stress and fatigue—may take a back seat to chores and errands. I know. Just to be totally open and authentic with you fabulous readers, I am experiencing Super Woman Syndrome right now, as well. Oh, I have the holidays in hand, but my business is ramping up this week with the launch of my new website, LoveYourWaySlim.com, and a tele-class I’m giving for Impact ADHD, both happening on Thursday, as well as the January 7 launch of a new coaching program and the planning of a Love Your Way Slim Beach-side Retreat in April. I am feeling the stress and my body is letting me know that my thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are not supporting me as I step into this new level of […]
Are You Being Selfish if You Take Care of You?
Are you taking care of you? Often women are reluctant to make caring for themselves a priority. This is particularly true during the holidays. You may feel like there is just too much to do. All the shopping, decorating, socializing, cooking, sending out holiday cards—the list goes on and on. Plus, you may be focused on creating a magical holiday experience for your kids and family. You may feel that taking care of you is being selfish. The Truth is that you have to take care of yourself first to have the stamina and energy to take care of others. Ask yourself, “Are you the best partner, mom, daughter, friend you can be if you’re over-tired? How much harder is it to get everything on your to-do list done if you don’t feel physically well?” A common response to the idea of establishing a routine of self-care that includes getting enough sleep, exercise, healthy foods, and quiet time for self-reflection or meditation is, “I don’t have time to do those things.” The Truth is you don’t have time NOT to do them. Making your self-care your highest priority—even if it’s only 15 minutes a day—will give you extra energy and vitality that will enable you to be the partner, mom, daughter, and friend you want to be. And it helps you “do” more in the time you do have. If you only have 10 to 15 minutes a day to take care of you, what should be highest priority? If you can do just one thing, figure out how to move your body in some way—even if it’s just 10 minutes a day. Exercise is powerful medicine. The list of its benefits is long and […]
How to Use Gratitude To Get the Body You Want
Do you ever catch yourself grumbling or complaining about what someone else did or didn’t do, or even how they did it? This is particularly prevalent during the holidays. You may be: Frustrated that your partner isn’t jumping in to do all the extra holiday chores. Irritated or overwhelmed at having to do everything yourself because nobody else can wrap those packages like you. Feeling unappreciated because all the time and energy you have put into making the house festive has gone unnoticed. What if those negative emotions you are feeling are impacting your wellness? Negative emotions generate catabolic energy that over time weakens your immune system, exhausts your physical energy, and can make it easier to gain and harder to release weight. What if letting go of the stress caused by negative emotions also means that you receive the benefits—body, mind, and spirit? Is it worth your health to let go of anger, frustrations, and resentments that are not only hurting you, but are actually keeping you from the body—and life—you want? Think about all the time out of your day that you feel frustrated, irritated, overwhelmed, exhausted, or powerless. Now compare that with how much time you spend feeling appreciative, loving, joyful, content, and hopeful? Where is your focus most of the time? If you are loving more than you are criticizing, awesome! You are already creating a body—and life—that you want. If you are spending more time grumbling or complaining, how is this reflected back to you in how your body looks and feels? One simple but profound way to begin shifting your core energy is to spend as little as a minute every day feeling grateful. This could be: Praising your partner for helping out, […]
5 Easy Tips to Make Creating Healthy Habits Fun!
Most people are not going to start a new eating or exercise program before January 2. But you can drastically increase the chances of fulfilling your New Year’s resolution to lose weight by creating new mental habits right now. And it can take as little as 5 minutes a day. Think about how much you get done when you are excited, eager, and looking forward to something. Now think about how hard it is to make progress when you are dreading something, don’t want to do it, resent it, etc. While you can move forward and get stuff done while you are feeling negative catabolic emotions, consciously shifting to positive anabolic thoughts before you begin a task is like putting on rocket boosters. Not only is your power to get things done greater, but it’s easier and more fun. Most of what makes releasing weight “hard” are your current mental habits. You have thoughts about how hard it is to lose weight that you have repeated for so long that you don’t even realize there’s another way to look at it. You have practiced dreading dieting. You have developed a mental rut on exercise that is not serving you. These are just some catabolic habits of thought you have going on. Thoughts are made of energy, not marble. They can be changed! Why do you want to go to the trouble of creating positive, life-building anabolic mental habits, you might ask? Because anabolic thoughts result in emotions that feel good. Those emotions make your heart sing. When you are feeling anabolic emotions, you know that things are always working out for you. When there’s a problem, you see the solution. You laugh more. You relax […]
Take a Step Towards the Healthy and Happy Holidays You Want
There’s a lot of tempting food around this time of year. Many of the women I work with feel out of control with their eating, or rebellious about holding back on holiday treats, or rationalize that “it’s just once a year.” So you eat. And eat. And then you mentally beat yourself up. We’re not talking about a little, “Oh, I shouldn’t have eaten that.” What often happens is a full-blown attack. We’re talking guilt. You say things to yourself like: “I am so weak.” “I’m so stupid.” “I’m ugly.” “I’m fat.” “I hate my body.” You say things that are totally and completely UNTRUE! You say things to yourself that you would never say to anyone else. And it is a painful place to be. I love the Dan Millman quote: “You began life with a natural, complete sense of worth. (Have you ever met an infant with self-worth issues?) But as you grow, you serve as your own judge, deducting points when you misunderstand the nature of living, and learning—when you forget you are a human-in-training and that making mistakes and having slips of integrity and mediocre moments are a part of life, not unforgivable sins.” Let me repeat the key sentence: “Making mistakes and having slips of integrity and mediocre moments are a part of life, not unforgivable sins.” This absolutely includes eating what you judge to be “bad” over the holidays. Or not being at what you feel is your optimal weight. Or not looking like a super model. Beating yourself up is NOT helpful. And it could very well end up making you feel so bad that you just give-up trying to eat healthy until the New Year. If you found yourself […]
Weird—and Wonderful!—Ways to Work In Wellness
Whoops! I woke up this morning with my body giving me a clear indication that I have not been honoring my self-care. Since this coincides with family arriving for Thanksgiving, I’ll be sharing some of my favorite blogs for the rest of the week. I choose this blog because it has great tips on how to work in wellness during the holiday, but it’s also a terrific reminder for me! Many people are so focused on the time that they don’t have for wellness that they miss all the small opportunities they do have to work physical and emotional wellness into their day. Taking advantage of these tiny moments can boost physical and mental energy, and generate a sense of well-being. Here are some ideas for slipping in your wellness fix—just don’t worry about what some people may think. After all, isn’t your wellness more important than a few seconds of potential judgment from a stranger, friend, family member, or co-worker? Minutes Matter Do you ever stand there and wait for your lunch to heat up in the microwave, or that pot of water to boil, or cup of coffee or tea to brew? Don’t just stand there! Even doing a few minutes of exercise can give you an energy boost. And those minutes add up. Do them throughout the day and before you know it, you’ve gotten in a 15 to 20 minute workout. Take that minute or two and do counter push ups, lunges, toe raises, and squats. You can also dance or march in place. I only got caught once dancing in front of the microwave in my work break-room. At the time my co-worker thought I was a little weird, but she also […]
Tips for Healthy Holiday Travel
People often say that travel is one of the hardest times to maintain their health and wellness. Add in Thanksgiving or another holiday, and many people just give up altogether. They may do this because they: Think it’s too hard. Think they will feel deprived. Think that they will impose on or disappoint family if they take care of themselves or skip dishes their loved one worked hard to prepare. Think that it’s just one time a year so what’s the harm? Think that there’s just too much temptation around and they aren’t strong enough to withstand it. Etc. Do you get that these are just thoughts that you keep thinking? What if: It’s easier than you currently believe? You can eat everything you really want and still stay on track? You are actually setting a positive example for your family? Your self-confidence shoots through the roof when you follow your wellness plan? You are much stronger than you can possibly imagine? Here are some tips that will help you stay on track while traveling for the holidays—or any time of year. Prepare for a Snack Attack One of the worst things you can do is not eat all day in preparation for a big meal. You are guaranteed that you will overeat and physically pay the price later. Instead, eat small, frequent meals throughout the day to keep your energy level high and hunger at bay. To do this, you may need to plan ahead and bring some snacks from home. These could include: A baggie of various nuts and dried fruit for a quick and easy trail mix. A stash of protein bars or home-made healthy treats. (One of my favorite road treats are some […]
Nine Tips To Break the Holiday Stress Tradition
Many of you may be traveling over the next week or have visitors coming to you to celebrate the American holiday of Thanksgiving. While the focus is on the feast, it may be your emotional wellness that is more strained than your waistband. The holidays—the time that’s supposed to be so magical and wonderful—are often the hardest time of year. Part of this is because of the temptation of all the extra food around. This leads to inner conflict. You may want to celebrate with food, but then you feel guilty about it. Or maybe you’re successful at resisting all that temptation, but then feel deprived and resentful. Or you may rebel at restraining your eating and binge on everything in sight. There may also be the stress caused by your perception of family expectations that you don’t feel like you can live up to. Or worse, your own expectations that everything has to be perfect. This may mean you pack too much into your to-do list. The result is you’re challenged when your priorities aren’t shared by others, which results in family tension. Again, you might turn to food to try to comfort yourself and deal with the stressful feelings. You put your own self-care at the bottom of the list so you aren’t taking care of you. It may also mean you spend too much time on details that don’t really matter and miss out on the things that do. This could look like staying up late trying to get every dish looking perfect, but then you are so tired that you scream at your kids the next morning. What’s really more important to you? Having a perfect dish, or getting enough rest to be […]
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