Some of the things I love most about babies are their tiny hands and feet.

It’s not only their miniature proportions, but the delicate nails and soft skin.

These hands that are just learning to grasp and feet that have not yet taken a step fully represent to me the innocence and frailty of each one of us as we enter this world totally dependent on others for our care.

In our adult bodies it’s hard to fathom that we were once that infant.

That the hand we use hundreds—if not thousands—of times a day is the same tiny hand of the infant US.

We fail to recognize that our body is our twin—it is the other we were born with and with whom we have shared every moment and physical sensation of this life experience.

To most women, their body is something to be dominated. They want instant action and results, or somehow their body is faulty and not to be trusted.

This is one of the mindsets that is keeping you stuck in the rebound weight-gain cycle.

What you have going with your body is a relationship in every sense of the word.

In fact, your relationship with your body is the longest—and most important—of your life. There is no reconciling from that divorce!

But what does having a relationship with your body really mean?

The foundation of any relationship is a mutual filling of needs.

In a good relationship, there is equality, affirmation, and understanding. And there is a connection and ability to relate to each other.

In a healthy relationship, each participant supplies something that the other needs.

This is definitely true with your body.

What is it that you need from your body?

Hint: there is no more critical need that you have.

You need your body for life!

Your body is critical to getting the most out of this lifetime. It is what enables you to interpret and explore your reality through sight, touch, taste, hearing, and smelling.

Through your body’s senses you can feel the ecstasy of your lover’s touch or the pain of a searing flame.

You need your body to explore and move and do. You cannot walk, run, swim, jump—even laugh—without your body.

You are dependent on your body, yet you most likely take it for granted.

Now, what does your body need from you?

Most people only think about the physical needs—quality fuel and regular movement. (And they don’t even meet those needs very well!)

But there is more.

Just as in any relationship, the body needs equality, affirmation, and understanding. It also has desires and is making requests about what it would like from this life experience.

How well have you been full-filling your body’s needs?

Do you regularly praise or condemn? Do you treat your body with love and understanding when it is hurt, or do you resent it, complain, and rush its healing? Do you listen for your body’s input when making decisions that impact it, or just demand that it do whatever you want?

That may sound crazy, but think about it.

Have you ever KNOWN that your body wasn’t up for something, but you did it anyway? And then you were surprised—and frustrated—when you got hurt?

Not too many years ago, I was changing my running form and I KNEW my body wanted some time to adapt and strengthen new muscles. But I had a race coming up, and several people encouraged me to “do it anyway.” In my last long run before the race, I wound up spraining my ankle. Not only was I not able to run the race, but my running was impaired for weeks.

If I had just listened to my own body wisdom—and not worried about what other people thought—I could have avoided that physical and emotional pain.

How well have you been showing up in your relationship with your body—which is truly your ultimate life partner?

How deep is your connection and ability to relate to your body?

To improve your relationship with your body, begin by visualizing what the perfect relationship with your body would look like.

• How are you moving?
• What are you doing?
• What are you eating?
• How are you feeling?
• What do you look like?
• How is your experience of life changed?

Use this vision to inspire you to begin making new decisions about your self-care.

Notice how your body responds to this changing relationship.

Together we can do it!

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