If you are like many women, you may feel that self-care is selfish.

You put everyone else’s needs first.

As a mom, wife, partner, professional . . . you may feel like you don’t have the time and energy to move your body and eat healthy foods.

But what if not making your self-care a top priority is really the selfish act? 

Your lack of self-care means:

• You may be cranky or short-tempered with those closest to you.
• You have to spend extra time and energy redoing or cleaning up things that went astray in your haste.
• You may do things for others, only to find that’s not what they wanted or needed.
• You may miss out on quality time because you are focused on doing rather than being.
• You may find yourself resentful of others because your needs aren’t getting met.

You cannot go through life exhausted and stressed and expect to be the best possible version of you.

Ask yourself, “Am I showing up consistently as the mom, wife, partner, professional I want to be?”

Allow yourself to be really honest with yourself.

If there is room for improvement, the answer is NOT to drive yourself harder.

The real solution is to make your self-care an unwavering priority.

Taking care of you first is the equivalent of being on a plane and putting the oxygen mask on BEFORE you help others.

When you fill your energy reserves first you have more to give.

When you make your self-care a priority you:

• See solutions that you otherwise would have missed.
• Have more energy so you get more done is less time.
• Have your priorities in better balance so you recognize that fun with your kids is more important than a spotless kitchen floor.
• Respond to others with love and compassion rather than criticism or crankiness.
• Enjoy life rather than endure it.

But when your life already feels like it is careening out of control, how do you fit in self-care?

• Put it in perspective. You don’t have to spend hours a day taking care of you. A 20-minute walk and 10 minutes of meditation a day can drastically improve your wellness and well-being.
• Schedule it first. Look at your calendar for the next week and plan when you will do your 20-minute walk and 10 minute meditation (or whatever you are going to do). Schedule everything around these activities. Only the biggest crisis can dislodge these from your plan for the day.
• Ask for help. Will your spouse/partner/kids/colleagues benefit from you showing up more consistently as the best possible version of you? Then let them in on your self-care plan and ask for help in keeping it a priority. Can your spouse put the kids down while you go meditate? Can your partner prepare dinner or do the dishes so you get your walk in? Can you request that no meetings be scheduled at Noon so you can take a walk around the block? Asking for what you need can be scary, but it is critical for breaking you out of the rebound weight-gain cycle.

Start taking healthy actions because of the love you have for others. The more you do this, you will find that you want to continue because of the love you have for yourself.

Together we can do it!

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