About 10 years ago, I had a friend whose husband died unexpectedly while they were getting ready for work.

He literally died in her arms.

I couldn’t imagine going through an experience much worse than that.

Not long after, I asked how she was doing. Her response was, “I’m having a few bad moments in otherwise good days.”

That struck me not only in the heart, but in the head.

If she wasn’t allowing the sudden and traumatic death of her husband to bring her down, what excuse did I have for complaining about anything going on in my life?

It was my first “aha” that what I focus on is a choice.

I was often letting one bad experience ruin my whole day. And I didn’t have to.

What I didn’t realize at the time was how important that realization was to my wellness.

Dwelling on negative events—past, present, or potential—impacts your body.

Your negative thoughts—about everything—releases the stress hormone cortisol, adrenaline, and other harmful chemicals that over time deteriorate your body at the cellular level.

This stress reaction can play a part in problems such as headaches, diabetes, skin conditions, asthma, arthritis, depression, and anxiety.

Over time, chronic stress impacts your:

• Immune system, making it more likely that you will get sick more often.
• Heart. Stress is linked to high blood pressure, abnormal heartbeat and hardening of the arteries, as well as coronary artery disease, heart attack, and heart failure.
• Muscles. Constant tension from stress can lead to neck, shoulder, and low back pain, and can also make rheumatoid arthritis worse.

If you already have a health problem, stress can make it worse. Seventy-five to 90 percent of all doctor’s office visits are for stress-related ailments and complaints.

Chronic negative thoughts and feelings also significantly impact your metabolism and other weight-related systems making it easier to gain and harder to release weight.

What are your thoughts doing to your body?

Do even extreme events in your life cause you to have a few bad moments in an otherwise good day, or does even a minor obstacle ruin your whole day?

Think about what you are doing when you complain about the traffic jam on the way to work, or the rude clerk, or your uncooperative kid.

• How much of your day did that experience take up?
• How much more time are you giving it after it’s over?
• How many more positive experiences actually happened in your day?

Often the event that you reacted to with negative thoughts and feelings didn’t last very long, yet it becomes something you give significant time to as you think and talk about it the rest of the day.

So why does it color your entire day?

As my friend demonstrated, no matter how significant the event, it is still your choice to focus on it—or not.

Taking control of creating the body—and life—you want doesn’t mean you will never experience difficult situations.

What it means is that you see those situations differently and choose your responses rather than just reacting as you always do.

You have the power to have a few bad moments in an otherwise good day—no matter what is going on in your life.

Or you can focus so much on that bad thing that you have a terrible day.

The challenge is, when you’ve gotten used to focusing on the negative events, it does takes a little persistence, practice, and patience to shift your focus to those things you can appreciate.

Here are some tips to switch your focus when you catch yourself in a negative rant:

• Make a list of things you appreciate that you read and add to daily.
• Stop and take 3 to 10 deep breaths.
• Focus on the buzz of your computer or hum of the air conditioner for 5 minutes.
• Look out the window for a few minutes and focus on a bird or plant.
• Put your hand on your heart and count the beats.
• Go take a walk around the block.
• Think about your pets, kids, or anything that makes you go Ahhh.

What can you focus on to make today a good day? How does that help you create a great body?

Together we can do it!

The Interview Is Tomorrow!

Jodie Rodenbaugh was 3 months pregnant with her 3rd child when her husband was accidentally killed.

Discover how Jodie turned personal tragedy into the catalyst to create an amazing body—and life—when I interview her on  . . .

Beautiful Inside and Out:

How Powerful Women Transformed Their Bodies

While Creating a Life They Love

Monthly interviews with successful women whose physical transformations were key to creating the body—and life—they really wanted.

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